Hillco Fastener Warehouse, Inc.

Our good friend and business associate, John Lazenby of Royze, Inc., recently shared this with us. We thought it was very entertaining and hope you will too!

DRILL PRESS: A tall upright machine useful for suddenly snatching flat

metal bar stock out of your hands so that it smacks you in the chest and

flings your beer across the room, denting the freshly-painted project

which you had carefully set in the corner where nothing could get to it.

WIRE WHEEL: Cleans paint off bolts and then throws them somewhere under

the workbench with the speed of light. Also removes fingerprints and

hard-earned calluses from fingers in about the time it takes you to say,

'Oh sh -- '

ELECTRIC HAND DRILL: Normally used for spinning pop rivets in their

holes until you die of old age.

SKILL SAW: A portable cutting tool used to make studs too short.

PLIERS: Used to round off bolt heads. Sometimes used in the creation of

blood-blisters.

BELT SANDER: An electric sanding tool commonly used to convert minor

touch-up jobs into major refinishing jobs.

HACKSAW: One of a family of cutting tools built on the Ouija board

principle. It transforms human energy into a crooked, unpredictable

motion, and the more you attempt to influence its course, the more

dismal your future becomes.

VISE-GRIPS: Generally used after pliers to completely round off bolt

heads. If nothing else is available, they can also be used to transfer

intense welding heat to the palm of your hand.

OXYACETYLENE TORCH: Used almost entirely for lighting various flammable

objects in your shop on fire. Also handy for igniting the grease inside

the wheel hub out of which you want to remove a bearing race.

TABLE SAW: A large stationary power tool commonly used to launch wood

projectiles for testing wall integrity.

HYDRAULIC FLOOR JACK: Used for lowering an automobile to the ground

after you have installed your new brake shoes, trapping the jack handle

firmly under the bumper.

BAND SAW: A large stationary power saw primarily used by most shops to

cut good aluminum sheet into smaller pieces that more easily fit into

the trash can after you cut on the inside of the line instead of

the outside edge.

TWO-TON ENGINE HOIST: A tool for testing the maximum tensile strength

of everything you forgot to disconnect.

PHILLIPS SCREWDRIVER: Normally used to stab the vacuum seals under

lids or for opening old-style paper-and-tin oil cans and splashing oil

on your shirt; but can also be used, as the name implies, to strip out

Phillips screw heads.

STRAIGHT SCREWDRIVER: A tool for opening paint cans. Sometimes used

to convert common slotted screws into non-removable screws and

butchering your palms.

PRY BAR: A tool used to crumple the metal surrounding that clip or

bracket you needed to remove in order to replace a 50 cent part.

HOSE CUTTER: A tool used to make hoses too short.

HAMMER: Originally employed as a weapon of war, the hammer nowadays

is used as a kind of divining rod to locate the most expensive parts

adjacent the object we are trying to hit.

UTILITY KNIFE: Used to open and slice through the contents of cardboard

cartons delivered to your front door; works particularly well on

contents such as seats, vinyl records, liquids in plastic

bottles, collector magazines, refund checks, and rubber or plastic

parts. Especially useful for slicing work clothes, but only while in

use.

DAMM-IT TOOL: Any handy tool that you grab and throw across the garage

while yelling 'DAMM-IT' at the top of your lungs. It is also, most often,

the next tool that you will need.

A 1909 Ford sales brochure noted that Ford moved the Model T steering to the left rather than the standard right hand position for cars of that time period. Their reasoning was that it was safer for passengers exiting on the right (curb side) rather than into the traffic lane due to the number of tractors and other agricultural equipment driving on the streets of many farming communities. Ford also noted that the left hand driving position allowed the driver better visibility and better judgment when passing oncoming vehicles. The popularity of the Model T made left hand steering the norm throughout the United States. (In 2009 the Model T turned 100 years of age!)

If you have a drop of gasoline in your blood you are contaminated, regardless of your birthplace, origin, culture, or your color, you are a certified Car Nut or Gear Head. I can remember from a very young age that when we smelled gasoline spring was definitely coming after a harsh winter and we started preparing for a new motoring season. My name is Josef Czikmantory of Hungarian origin. I was born and raised in Eastern Europe in a particular part of Romania called Transylvania. That mystical part of this unknown and misunderstood part of the world, have always had a great tradition of cars and motorcycles and boiling blood infected with gasoline. I believe I inherited this "blood infection" from my maternal grandfather. He was a real old car nut and very handy. I think I inherited by father's ability who was very technical and could create miracles from pieces of junk!

At the age of 19 I bought my first motorcycle, and at 25 my famous TRABANT. To own a car at that time and in that place was a privilege and a dream for most of the people. The TRABI [it is a nickname for the TRABANT] was my limo, truck, off road, bootlegging, Christmas tree hauler, and all the daily basic stuff; my hotel on east European roads traveling from the Black Sea to the Baltic Sea, equivalent here in the United States to coast to coast. The little car never let my down. He took me over heavily guarded borders into and around communist countries; and, in 1986, finally he was my partner in crime as we crossed over the notorious Iron Curtain where many people lost their lives trying to escape from communist Europe.

I refurbished my old TRABI 30 some years ago. He got a new white paint job with black bumpers, head and tail light rims, head liner, fresh interior, sound proofing with my own recipe (contact cement mixed with slow drying hammer finish paint and rubber dust, creating a paste and applying on undercarriage and side panels). I had a spare engine and every 2 years after driving 50,000-60,000 kilometers [31,000-37,000 miles] it needed to be rebuilt.

After helping me gain freedom I had to abandon the old TRABI on the Western side of the Iron Curtain. In 2005, after almost 20 years living in the United States, I found and bought on eBay a TRABI paying $800 for the car and $2000 for shipping. This car was a different model, but it was a TRABI, just a little bit different. It was originally baby blue with tan interior. With my son helping me, we decided to refurbish this one like so it would look like the little car that helped us escape to freedom. White and black! My son remembers being a 10 year old, sitting in the back as we crossed borders making our escape.

The TRABI was not intended be a show car. I refurbished it for fun to my standards. It became a show car almost by accident in response to a suggestion that I tell its story. Refurbishing the TRABI in a corner of a 45,000sq/feet shop it was just peanuts. I know every bolt and nut and all the tricks of working on it after just a short time. For me the 8220 and 8221 are just okay, but this little automobile is outstanding to other people because of what it represents.

On a daily basis I have to make fast and responsible business decisions in designing and building large CNC machines with space age technology for customers producing large and high precision parts for aerospace, energy, medical, military or common use. I wanted to share this unique little car to show the differences in this world and the world behind the Iron Curtain and to be a part of Southern California car culture.
I wish you happy and safe motoring and hope to see you at other car shows or weekend gatherings.

Josef Czikmantory
Hacienda Heights, California